Lessons of Wayne “Juggler” Elise is not presented in order of how attraction should be generated, it is in an order that reveals the essence of The Juggler Method. The lessons provided here compliment and expand upon the eBook:“How to Meet and Connect with Women.”
Seduction Four Major Escalations
3. Show Sexual Intent (SOI)
Generate attraction during these stages by putting skills out while flirting.
Jugglers’ method of escalating from “platonic to sexual” by stating your intent. Why SOI?
You must lead the interaction in order to overcome their Anti Slut Defence (A.S.D.) You only reveal your intent when you find the girl genuinely attractive
Two common mistakes
1. SOI too soon
2. Never show sexual attraction
By finding her unique qualities.
By basing the attraction on a commitment shes made to you. By bringing value out of her “unique-self”.
An SOI must be sincere to work. An SOI must not be rushed.
Soccer Analogy: chill out and the ball will come to you, the same applies for the opportunity to SOI.
Use an SOI to judge her interest, pay attention to her facial reaction and response. Once she has accepted your SOI: stay sexual, keep a flirty rapport.
If you want to close in front of a group, SOI your target in front of that group. This overcomes their Anti Slut Defence
Seduction 1.2 Inner Game
Confidence comes with Experience.
No NLP book will provide the solution to true confidence.
Start by realising that we put too much pressure on ourselves to make the interaction work.
Success = Feel Good
Fail = Feel Bad
We can avoid this by detaching ourselves from our EGO.
Seduction 2. Logistics
“Presume attraction, work on logistics.” -Juggler
In the moment she can be really into you, but often she won’t hook up because she is scared you’ll do something stupid to mess up her current relationship.
Don’t be scared to ask if she has a boyfriend.
The truth is that almost all attractive women have a boyfriend.
If you show that you are OK with her relationship situation, she’ll commit because she knows you won’t do anything stupid.
How long have they been going out?
0 to 3 months = often still exciting
Years = if they haven’t made a commitment yet they are likely to be bored.
Show that you are OK with her reactions by couching everything she says.
Embrace their relationship. There is often a reason why girls don’t have a boyfriend, they could be psychotic? Utterly selfish? Completely confused?
Talk about it. Often she will judge your reaction to her situation.
She will see if you are uncomfortable. If so, change your belief, be OK with entering tired relationships.
3D Block of Marble Analogy: assume the relationship is perfect.
If it is perfect, support it and build friendship. If she sees you are cool guy you’ll be introduced to her friends and invited to parties.
If it has cracks, she must reveal these to prompt the chase.
When she has a problem, she doesn’t expect you to solve it
Memorize this phrase, “I have confidence that you will be able to take care of the situation.”
If you want to get her number and meet up with her again, find out her relationship situation. However if you just want to make out with her at the bar, her relationship situation is not necessary. Ultimately it’s a calibration issue, however it doesn’t hurt to ask “So who are you here with?” or “So how do you guys know each other?”
Most importantly: have fun with logistical questions, you are not interviewing her.
Seduction 3. Comfort Building
The necessary platform to escalate from “platonic to sexual”.
Don’t be a stranger; lead the conversation by revealing something unique about your life. Speak in the “I” perspective.
3 Conversational Perspectives:
GOD = Judgement oriented = Un-engaging.
YOU = People still don’t feel that they know you. “I” = Comfort Building = Engages a stranger.
You are the main character of your own movie
Talk about yourself, not your possessions. Put yourself out there by displaying vulnerabilities. “I” allows her to agree
“me too” which is a huge tool to create connections.
When you hear something she is passionate about, yet you are unfamiliar with use this opportunity to get her to invest in you and the interaction.
“I know nothing about…. what is the foundation of….”
Tell personal stories and jokes for her to reciprocate not purely to entertain her.
Build group comfort by letting others commit to the show, even if they are less entertaining.
“Commitment is more important that being GOOD.” -Juggler
You can only make someone commit so much, balance the commitment by rewarding and relating.
Seduction 4. Vacuum
Show high expectations by asking demanding questions.
By putting her on the spot to start, the interaction will have a rollercoaster effect: what comes after will flow with pleasure. Notice: Any interaction with a new acquaintance is going to be uncomfortable to start: make her work from the beginning.
Ask big, open-ended questions:
Can you recommend a good book? (Yes/ No) VS
What’s a good book you can recommend? (Open-ended: takes effort)
If she says “I don’t know…”, answer the same question from your own perspective, followed by a more specific open-ended question.
Asking big questions implies you think that you are worthy; you must at the same time appear as if you are enjoying every stage of the interaction.
Seduction 5. Presumption Opener
Social situations are very different from business situations. Socially it is better to sound certain and be “wrong”, than to hesitate and be “right”.
On Taxi: “Which famous people have you driven”
All beautiful girls think they are artistic.
To HB: “What type of art do you do?”
If she says no: “Well you seemed artistic.” Notice: the times you are wrong she feels she has let you down. On campus: “So what are you studying for?”
Look at demographics, they can be interesting and a fun way of starting conversations. Display power through presumptions.
“I’ll have a glass of house red wine and spaghetti without the meat please.”
Assume people are who you’re looking for at busy institutions: “Hey Sheela, I’m here for the show….”
Don’t worry whether they are telling the truth from the beginning. They may be trying to please you, go with it, be
And if you are wrong, go with it, explain why you made the presumption then go into the “I” perspective and reveal something.
However don’t presume how someone thinks or has certain feelings. Keep presumptions neutral.
What do you like best about Oxford? (Bad) VS
Tell me what you think of Oxford? (Personal but not intruding) OR What do you recommend I see in Oxford? (Personal but not intruding)
What type of yoga do you do?
What’s your favourite vegetarian dish? What do you see in this painting? What’s the celebration about?
“Statements, like good writing should be flat, no fluff.”-Juggler
Seduction 5.2 Focus Opener
Go where they are thinking.
Intuit what is going on in her mind during a situation. At a Levi’s Sale:
“They always put your size at the bottom.” Guess what her “Focus” is on.
People watch: be imaginative, guess their focus and tell them what they are thinking.
Seduction 5.3 Situational Opener
Approach anxiety is caused by time. Time allows you to think too much.
What do you think about before the approach? Nothing! Create a situational opener within distance.
It is much better to open with “crap” than to think about the perfect opener: starting a conversation with a new acquaintance is always going to be awkward at the start. The shabby opener won’t matter once you get her engaged in your conversation. Following a situational opener, Juggler uses one of 3 things to build attraction: He disqualifies himself, speaks from the “I” perspective or asks an open-ended question.
Motorway analogy: When you are driving along the motorway and a deer appears out of nowhere, you will slam the breaks on and try to swerve out of the way. At that moment, you only have how you are going to avoid the deer in your mind. Fear comes after due to time. Once you have avoided the accident and had time to think, you may shake with fear: never before.
Seduction 6. Conversation
When women ask you questions, their expectations are low: often they are just trying to make small talk. She doesn’t wasn’t to know your job title, she wants to hear you talk about it.
A. Tell her what its like. Describe the interesting aspects, what makes it unique, the good and the bad. Use examples, “For instance…”
B. Then tell her what you do. She will have a new “definition” of your job, a new perspective of what a “lab scientist” does.
The same applies to: Where do you live?
What’s your relationship situation? What’s your passion in life?
What’s your family like?
Realise that by default she doesn’t believe anything you say. Details make your conversation believable. Your aim is to let them see what you are describing, keep your words simple and describe where you are in your own movie scene. These details don’t have to be 100% positive, disqualify: admit something you dislike, maybe you can’t get a damn taxi at 3am after clubbing. However end your statement in the positive: it is necessary to make the interaction feel positive.
What if she ends on a negative? Start by agreeing with her negative, but show her that you see opportunity and turn it into a positive. Think Judo, go with the flow.
Show her that negativity doesn’t throw you off: when she is negative presume she is attracted to the opposite. Keep
this in your mind and make it your job to show her the light. If she hates fish, presume she likes meat.
If she hates traffic, presume she is for the environment.
“People with negative mindsets don’t take risks.”
When they ask you to “guess their age” make a counter-demand, ask them to describe what its like being their age.
Play the game: by making counter-demands you keep the conversation flowing without supplicating.
“Yes, I’ll buy you a drink but you get the cookies”,
“No” just destroys the vibe. Be creative:
“Yes, but only if I get to choose” (If they serve Milk, Johnny Saviour delivers). “Yes, when I get to know you better”
Change her path
Correct her questions if they aren’t related to your statements: “I think what you are getting at is….”
Agree with her statements from your unique perspective.
This is a method of agreeing without supplicating. You use your perspective as a pivot to her statements. “That’s true, in my experience…”
This balances the interaction, which should be about you as much as her.
If someone is asking a serious question and you answer with a joke, you will lose rapport. If you have something amusing to say, keep the joke, but finish with your real answer. It is always more important to be sincere than smart.
Paint in Primary Colours
Use contrast to make your conversation interesting.
Don’t paint in grey: “I kinda like London” Paint in black & white: “I love… I hate…”
Talk in extremes, reveal your perspective: take risks.
Realism is a shade of grey.
Bracket negative statements with positive emotion. To girl queuing in front of you: “I hate you!”
It all depends on the spin you put on the interaction.
There is no failure until you think you have failed.
Joke about the shortcomings of your joke.
Use your hands to visualise writing a note while saying: “Never tell that joke ever again.”
“Never ask that question ever again.”
Think aloud: show that you are comfortable with messing up.
Balance the focus of the interaction and always look as though you are enjoying yourself, even when it is negative.
Seduction 7. Disqualification
For every given moment, she has the “perfect man”. We don’t want to be the “perfect man”.
She says: Lying is a bad thing.
Beginner: “I don’t lie.” He supplicates to agree.
More experienced: Disagrees with the statement. He undermines rapport. PUA: “I agree, lying is bad, but sometimes I lie about stupid things, we all do.”
By disqualifying yourself you loosen her control over an interaction. By showing that you are comfortable with who you really are, you exude confidence. You are actively displaying that you are not trying to court her good opinion. You are showing that you don’t categorise: which in itself is a neurotic tendency. Instead you break convention, bringing risk into the situation. By taking the lead you are making others feel more comfortable around you which should result in more realistic conversations.
When she puts you in the frame of perfection, it is an opportunity to disqualify. Otherwise she will tear it away from you before you get laid.
Gain value by actively showing that you are not trying to prove yourself. Disqualification has to be real, don’t make up flaws!
Seduction 8. Relating
Speak in the “I” perspective and relate with feelings.
Be in the moment. Relate spontaneously by describing what you like.
Stories are stronger the closer to the present they are: watch good comedians their show always goes “Last night…”
Be ok with silence, this will prevent you from putting yourself on the spot when you shouldn’t.
Seduction Difficult Questions
Don’t repeat their questions. Improvise; go for their demanding questions even if answering them seems unnatural.
Seduction Stall Techniques
Take pressure off yourself by thinking aloud.
“That’s a really good question. I have not idea about…”
“I’m out of material, you’re gonna have to make all the jokes now.”
Ask logistical questions when you sense that they are uncomfortable: “Who are you here with?” If the interaction is truly stalling, take a second to realise where you want to take it.
Seduction 9. Group Dynamics
“Be the one spoken to. Be the ringmaster not performer.” –Juggler
Your aim is to bring people together, to make groups cohesive. Physically: by bringing people into your discussions. Get others in the group to commit to the conversation: this will get you leverage to gain control over bigger, more important things later.
When approaching a mixed set, speak to a guy first, find out their relationship situation with the girls. Follow it with
“You don’t mind if I speak to her then.”
During group dynamics, holding the vacuum is a showdown: he who is most comfortable with silence has control.
Seduction 10. Sexual Tension
Create rules to the point where she wants throw them away.
Reveal that you find her uniquely attractive (SOI), but that you can’t hook up for a certain reason (Sexual Tension). “I find your passion for soul music really sexy. It’s a shame I don’t I kiss on the first date.”
“Your smile is really sexy, but I’m gonna stop there before you get a big head!”
“The way you talk about yoga is really sexy, but you’re gonna have to stop. You’re turning me on.”
Seduction 11. Nuggets
Women do not judge you on your intrinsic value; they judge you on how you feel to them in the moment.
Alpha nice, drop your facial expressions when you first meet someone. Follow the handshake and their effort to present themselves with a smile. (physical vacuum -> physical reward)
Get someone to commit at the beginning of an interaction. When they say their name in a loud bar/club, reply: “Sorry, how do you spell that?”
Night focus is socialising.
Like poker, the more committed you are to the game, the more stupid your choices.
To feel comfortable before a date, literally imagine she is your best friend: that harmless guy who you can be your light-hearted-self with.
Girls need 2 things to hook up:
1. To feel that they have the ability to put the brakes on.
2. To know that if they really want to hook up, they can make it happen.
- Joshua Pellicer – Hacking Attraction
- Guide to Handling Chicks Karl Marks & Dan Indante – The Complete Asshole’s Guide to Handling Chicks
- How to Have a XXX Sex Life
- Ethical Slut A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities
- Clive Westwood – Ultimate MMA Fighter Champion Hypnosis
- Approach Anxiety Destroying – Pick Up Artist Hypnosis – Clive Westwood
- Natural Charm Installation System – Jason Capital
- 2 Girls Teach Sex Pack